Eric's Bread Making Madness

"How can a nation be great if its bread tastes like Kleenex?"  --Julia Child

Eric wants Zambia be a great nation, so in November he made his first loaf of bread.  Since then he's made over 100 artisan loaves. I've been married to this man for nearly a decade, and I'm shocked by his new obsession.  However, looking back I should have noticed the warning signs:

1.  Eric didn't want to make bread from store-bought yeast.  Ohhhhhh, no.  He had to make is own natural yeast starter out of organic grapes from our yard which, as a concept is delightful.  The reality is that it's like caring for another child.  What's more, he created this monster and then went on a business trip, so yours truly had to babysit it for a week.  He was so concerned that I would murder the fermenting glob that he posted this note and urged my daughter to remind me every-single-night not to forget "Daddy's starter."  Which she did. Every. Single. Night.

Care instructions for the Monster

2. Eric bought himself a wheat grinder for Christmas.  The internet insists that commercially ground wheat loses vitamins, but the truth is, you are a better human if you grind your own wheat.  It's even better if you have friends who are organic farmers. Pesticide-free wheat, I'm told, may include some grain weevils.  Here's Wikipedia's fun fact about grain weevils: Females nibble a hole in a kernel, lay an egg, and then seal hole with a "gelatinous secretion."  That's like a superfood on steroids!

The Baker

3. Eric's found like-minded bread fanatics.   While he's converted most of these people himself, he discovered another male, bread-baking kindred spirit after five minutes of meeting him.  They've since exchanged flax seed, crushed soy beans, and sourdough starter.  They may even have a special handshake and t-shirts by now.

My homemade jam makes the bread.

I love to tease my husband, but I must be careful, because the truth is, his bread is the best bread in Zambia.  I sure don't want to be cut off his supply chain, especially when the alternative tastes like Kleenex.